Polishing eyeballs.

I re-waterproofed my black leather boots today. I then decided they needed to be polished. I didn't have time to polish them properly with Kiwi wax and two brushes so I succumbed to Mr Sheen. Alas, the Mr Sheen canister had lost its press and squirt nozzle and only the little protruding tube was available. I quickly removed the press and squirt nozzle from the Glade air freshener and stuck it on the top of the polish can. I squirted the boots and rubbed them with a glove covered in microfibre villi. They didn't look the least bit shiny but it was the best I could do in the time allowed, As I returned the polish to its place in the basket under the sink, the little nozzle fell off. Anxious that I shouldn't lose it in case I needed it for the air freshener or the polish another day, I popped it back on the Mr Sheen can and looking carefully to see it was on straight, I pressed it into place. I now have the shiniest left eyeball you've ever seen and quite a shiny nose and forehead. As I swilled my eyes with cold water, I wished I'd used kiwi wax and two brushes.
In Psalm 144 of the Bible you will find a verse about women being polished, "that our daughters may be polished after the similitude of a palace" the Psalm goes on to talk about happiness, I'll use the old fashioned version because it's very poetic . "Happy is that people, that is in such a case, Yes, happy are the people whose God is the Lord."
The Bible might tell me that women who polish their eyeball till it sparkles like a palace are "such a case" but I can tell you something else it says: If you make God, the Lord of your life, you'll be a happy person. As always, I find the Bible both relevant and true.

Water bottle

I was listening to an older lady chatting to her friends today. She was telling them that her granddaughter had visited this morning and as she was on her way out of the house, she asked if her Nan had a water bottle. The old lady rushed off to get one and was surprised at the young woman's puzzled look when she handed her a hot water bottle.
"I'm going to the gym Nan, what's this for?"
Speaking of hot water bottles, it's not a good idea to fill one in the night without putting the light on. The necks aren't built for tired people working in the dark with a kettle full of boiling water.
Which leads me on to small holes in another context. I made a pin hole camera  from a cereal box to see the solar eclipse last week. Apart from being amazed at the speed with which the moon moves, watching a little black dot move across a little white dot at the bottom of a corn flake carton was something of an anti-climax after the big build up.
God is so much bigger than we think yet he's happy to pour himself into somebody as small as me. (and you, if you'd like him to.)

Comic Relief

I was listening to a conversation between to ladies in a changing room today. One asked the other if she had watched 'Red Nose Day'. "I recorded it," the lady replied, "I fast forward past all those suffering children, and just watch the funny bits. You can't watch all those suffering children can you? It ruins it ."
I overheard part of another conversation this weekend too. As I walked by I heard a man say "She's ordered the headstone, so that's made her happy."